Thursday, July 10, 2008 •
& spongebob is cute 4:32 PM
A week ago, I was jumping with joy. A day ago, I was lamenting.Shit! Shit!! Shit! That was what I murmured to myself when I was not one of the 8 who were chosen for the finals. Well, that is not the only reason. Do you want to know what was my rank out of the 18 people who participated in the finals? Position 9! Arghhhhhh! Just one rank. Just one rank...I lamented. I felt so left out. I felt like a looser. Now I know how Alexia, Farah and the basketball team felt this year, when they lost, after coming so close to the winning line. But, I was happy for a new found friend there, who made it. I tried to suppress my agony of loosing, with the joy of a friend winning. But to no avail. The agony won over the joy. But, personally, I thought I had what it takes to be one of the final 8. I felt I had the passion. But I felt two of the selected 8 did not have that. They, forgot lines, spoke Singlish. I thought it was only me. May be the anger of loosing. May be I was trying to console myself. That I deserved it but the 2 did not. So I went to ask the friend who made it. She too, felt it. Then I thought, she is too young. How can she tell that? So, next I asked a few adults. They had the same feelings too! Were the 2 of them really not deserving candidates? Nevertheless, I came home feeling dejected, with Miss Seet. Told my mum the results. Nags. Can't feel angry at her. Was still lamenting over my defeat. Switched on computer. Signed in to MSN. A few people were online. Then, I started chatting with Catherine. Told her that I had lost. I started to pour my feelings to her. She gave a keen listening ear. After listening, she started to console me, by saying, I had strong competitors. And I was strong too. She also said that, I had already given my very best. She also tried to add humour, by saying, if she were there, she would be the first person to be out in the preliminary round itself. LOL. After listening to her consolations, I felt better. I always heard in TV, that a listening ear helps. Yesterday, I experienced it too. But one thing Miss Seet told me to console me, I have defeated 30 over people. Isn't that a great achievement itself?Today, I told Miss Chia. Se asked me to asked myself that, what did I not have, that the winning 8 has. I still can't find the answer. Will update you when I do so.I would just like to make my point clear. Counselling helps. Especially, if you know that person. And the person knows you.
